Craving Conjurer T-Shirts

"Man, what I wouldn't do for some Chinese take-out."

To do before Saturday...

Bright Idea

"Each order comes with 10 minutes of free guilt counseling."

"Still suffering from writer's block?"

Artist's Equipment Comes To Life

"Can you rewrite this in 3-D?"

'Think, son! What was that formula you fed that tree?!'

"For my next trick, I shall turn four consecutive quarters of losses into a positive outlook going forward."

'I've forgotten the author and title - do you read minds?'

Goldylocks and the Three Beers.

'I brought Simmons here on board to use his powers of levitation on our customer intelligence.'

'You just don't know when to give up, do you?'

'There's been an update. Instead of abracadabra, it's option/control key.'

"I've just discovered this brilliant new ingredients."

"Take a letter, any letter"

"Let 'em try to regulate this!"

Try typing "wishes," then hold down the "command" key.

"Eye of newt, wing of bat, blah blah blah, here's one I made earlier."

Fallen Angel.

'Diet Plan Rule number one: Stop using ice cream truck music as your ringtone.'

'Dad says you can throw your voice. Toss it here.'

"The card you are thinking of is... the fifth of Jacks!"

"She works best in hex mode."

"The usual, please."

Overeaters anonymous meeting 9 to 10pm

"Open Resume!"

Hudibras - 8 - Hudibras beats Sidrophel, and his man Whachum.

"Now that we taped some inspiration to a wall, we can finally start staring with our arms crossed while making the 'hmmmm' sound."

Paint charming.

'I've started this new 'Detox' diet - no caffeine or alcohol...no processed foods...

"It's tough sticking to a diet when you're surrounded by temptation."

Witching Hour

'I've decided to help you diet. I had invisible fencing installed around the refrigerator.'

'You do good web design, but there's not a lot of variety in it.'