Crafting Connoisseur Gifts

Craft Floss

Sewing A Christmas Dress.

'Uh-oh! It's the pun police!'

"Like a grind stone cowboy!"

"I've looked everywhere and I can't find what I need, so I'm making my own."

Instructional guide to scribbling

Schubert's Unfinished Basement

"We're having one heck of a time building that trapezoidal thing of yours..."

"Happy Anniversary, dear! It's a gold spray-painted macaroni necklace."

"1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood"

Sundar Pichai's first doodle.

Origami horse leaping out of a book about origami

"He's an abstract artist."

'According to this, she began making wine in her laundry room 30 years ago, and now she's moved on to the garage.'

'Henderson always walks away with the neighborhood pumpkin carving contest.'

'The grammar's awful and the spelling's atrocious - otherwise it's an impressive CV.'

Once again overbudget and past dealine, the predatory boa constractor adroitly squeezes the life from its victim's wallet.

Whittler's Mother.

"She's a natural!"

Posh Easter Egg

Dave cut costs and now realizes that in order to pass inspection, he may have to arrange a marriage between his daughter and the building inspector's son.

'It's good of you to go out of your way to show me what not to do, Mum.'

'I think this is deep enough for the foundations!'

Crane fishing

About the potter.

101 uses of a dead cat: pincushion

"I hear you've got friends in high places...?"

Man-made vs dog-made

'I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you!'

Daniel Day Lewis & George Glasgow

"It's called 'Sold'."

"No, we're looking for a roofer, not a woofer."

"I can now fetch anything you want - on Etsy."

Thor's Other Tools

'It's a good building contract legally, but your jargon's weak.'