Cow-themed Humorist Gifts

Cow writer.

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Hamburger bar, "I don't like the look of this Charlie"

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

'Dogs are so silly: Just throw a ball or a stick and they'll chase it and bring it back!'

Bubble Gum Farms.

Cow Show Tunes

"Wow, these slippers are really warm!"

"Well, here's the problem. You been takin' the hair ball pills and givin' the Viagra to the cats."

'Of course I'm being catty. How else do you expect me to act?'

"Scuba cow"

'Jurassic Pork.'

Motorherd

Hats and Food

"Yes, one is a dog."

'...Excuse me...Whoops, my fault!..Sorry!..You first...Pardon Me...Sorry...S'cuse me...Look out!...Pardon'

'Roy! For the last time, don't wave that red one in front of your Dad.'

"Yep. Looks like we have ringworm."

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

Moo Out Loud

'While you're 'fixing' my private parts, could you give me a loaner pair?'

"Grass-cream! Thanks Mum!"

'Well, I guess we're the control group.'

'Mom and dad...if someone threw a rock at me, it would really be like killing two birds with one stone.' 'I told you if we had a child, he'd be a wise-quacker.'

"That product you are using is fantastic. Your eye bags are gone."

No jay walking.

'Bird Watching is fun, but it tends to make me salivate...'

"Hey! There's a hair in my soup!"

"Toadstool you say? No, this is snailstool now!"

Northeastern Deer/Southwestern Deer

"I'm concerned. You seem to have catlike reflexes."

"I think I'm beginning to embrace humiliation."

"All you're doing is emboldening cats."

"You might want to start bringing more carrots home, dear. I think I have an ingrown hare."

"Did you know he'd joined a squirrel watchers club?"

'Settle an argument. Which is better incessant barking or meowing?'