Covid Confidant Pillows

"Freud doesn't work for you, so I', going to try some Dr. Anthony Fauci..."

"And when the canyon fills up, that's it; herd immunity."

Licensed Therapist

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

'I know he doesn't like this house, but he'll just have to get used to it.'

The Cougher

"Who's a good boy? You're a good boy."

Strainspotting

Time for tea and friendship.

"Your love gives me strength."

"You're missing the whole gestalt of Frisbee!"

Of course your master calls you 'Man's best friend'. As your attorney I advise you to get it in writing.

"I need to self isolate. . . but I thought I'd better come in and see you first!"

'You know, if you had one of those bumper stickers, I wouldn't be in doggy-therapy.'

'My building inspector just doesn't understand me.'

"Nobody listens to me complain quite like you do."

"Darn it, lost another swab."

"I've been getting really excited about squirrels even when my dog isn't with me."

Personal Assistants.

"So tell me more about the dog sitter."

'A common problem - we all give them our undivided love and devotion.'

Spa Dog

"Remember if anyone there asks... We're all from one household!"

'I've been depressed ever since PBS said pigs are smarter than dogs!'

"Peterson should be sure to win the Nobel Prize! He has proven that the mutated Coronavirus also mutates laboratory rats!"

'Don't get me wrong, the professional dog-walker is nice, but it is not really the same as if my Master was walking me...'

"IS this an unauthorised social gathering?"

"It's my box of secrets. It has things I've thought about but would never tell anyone!"

"He's anxious to resume perpetrating his usual activities."

'These computer viruses are getting more and more powerful.'

"I've just discovered this brilliant new ingredients."