Courtroom Sprinter Gifts

"Athlete? No. Ambulance chaser."

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

Recruiting litigation lawyers is ALWAYS tricky..my last one took me to court for the emotional and professional damage I caused him by NOT considering him for a position I wasn't asked to fill.

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

I love Lawyers

'Court's in recess!'

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

"When it comes to medical malpractice, most lawyers only go for the money... ...I go for the doctor's head."

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

Unfettered Corporate Campaigning.

First you're a law student, then you're a lawyer, then you're a judge, then you're a politician, then you're a criminal.

Planet of the Lawyers

"I object!" "Overruled!"

"I've learned something in this trial. My firm needs to hire that prosecutor."

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

"Well, heck! If all you smart cookies agree, who am I to dissent?"

"I've asked you not to overrule me in front of the children."

The Birth of a Lawsuit

'The Grand Jury doesn't understand me...'

"Your Honor, prior to sentencing, if it please the court, I'd like to make just a few brief remarks about pâte brisée."

Portrait of a Serial Attorney.

'They named special prosecutors to investigate each other.'

Justice 4 Ron

"In a just world we'd have 'No Lawyer Left Behind'."

"Just one more outburst and I can have this chicken tenderized."

'He's not called the 'Hanging About Judge' for nothing.'

'Don't blame the lawyer!'

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

'Oh, he's been a bad dog all right - why else would he lawyer up?'

'What do lawyers really want, Mr. Montague?'

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

"At least he's honest about it..."