Courtroom Adventurer Gifts

"You'll probably get five years on the manslaughter charge, but the bankruptcy will be with you for ten years."

Trial by Media

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

Recruiting litigation lawyers is ALWAYS tricky..my last one took me to court for the emotional and professional damage I caused him by NOT considering him for a position I wasn't asked to fill.

I love Lawyers

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

Barristers

"Whoa, don't ask constitutional questions you don't want to know the answers to."

"Since you have already been convicted by the media, I imagine we can wrap this up pretty quickly."

"When it comes to medical malpractice, most lawyers only go for the money... ...I go for the doctor's head."

Unfettered Corporate Campaigning.

First you're a law student, then you're a lawyer, then you're a judge, then you're a politician, then you're a criminal.

'Normally, I hate a rush to judgement - but I'm doing this case pro bono.'

Planet of the Lawyers

"I've learned something in this trial. My firm needs to hire that prosecutor."

"I felt I could make more of a difference within the system."

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

"I object!" "Overruled!"

John W. Law., John W. Law Jr., Robert Law, Janet Law, Attorneys at Law

Prosecution bears the burden of proof. Defense bears the burden of twisting and distorting said proof.

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

Yawning barristers in court

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

"Well, heck! If all you smart cookies agree, who am I to dissent?"

"Objection! Pummelling the witness."

"I'm not leading the witness; I'm winding up my segment on heinous crimes!"

'The next case Your Honor, is a palimony suit. The ant vs the grasshopper.'

'Your mom is probably watching. Go for the jugular.'

"In a just world we'd have 'No Lawyer Left Behind'."

Robert Macaire as a Solicitor

"I've asked you not to overrule me in front of the children."

"Boy is he good! He's even got me convinced you're guilty!"

"Assisting me with this delicate procedure is Dr. Warren. He's one of the top specialists in avoiding malpractice suits."

The Birth of a Lawsuit

'The Grand Jury doesn't understand me...'