Coupon Clipper Gifts

'I either need more money or more coupons.'

'Our survey shows there's more confidence in shopping coupons that the dollar...'

"The only thing that's not gone up is the pound."

Supa- Kosher-Mart

8 Foodscare products or less.

'I can get you off on the assault and armed robbery charges, but this reusing coupons that are limited to one per family...'

Supermarket bill turns into snake

UK supermarket to employ 20,000: 'Don't forget madam, if you spend over ?40 we'll give you a member of staff to take home with you.'

'Another credit card offer - and not a minute too soon!'

Bargain basement sale...

'My wife is going to kill me. All her shopping coupons are in that lost luggage.'

'Look, is it 'Buy one - get one free', or 'Two for the price of one'?'

Prices Down!

Newspaper special offers.

In his inimitable way, Carl quickly sucks the romance out of his and Diane's 15th anniversary dinner.

Coupon Door

Buy one get one free.

"Yes I know it says they have a value of one mil, sir, but I can't take these coupons for a deposit!"

Cut Price

"And do you promise never to pay full price? You may now exchange coupons..."

"I'm all about price point. Think of a discounted price and point."

"No time - coupons are expiring!"

'See, money can buy happiness and I have a dollar off coupon, too!'

I suppose you're wondering why I've summoned you here at 3 a.m., minion. I try not to wonder. After crunching the numbers, I've determined we'd increase profits by being open 24/7. We're in the suburbs everyone's asleep. Not true. By being closed at 3 a.m, we're missing out on the potentially lucrative Igor the Wino clientele. Go to the alley and give Igor a 1-for-the-price-of-2 coupon. Very bad man.

Market. Last night I spilled broth on my store discount clipping for mustard. There's soup on your Poupon coupon!

You call me cheap, but I saved 28 cents on these crackers. How many stores did it take? Three. And how much did you spend on gas? I walked. Face it, mother. You're just plain cheap. You make it sound so harsh. I so prefer "careful with money." "Skinflint" has a nice ring. Chips.

Keep your eyes open for ways to trim the family budget. As if! Don't blow her off. If we have no ideas, she'll trim us! How about that? Good sighting. Mom? Dry cleaner. 15% off men's shirts, pants. Somehow that idea did not occur to me.

"I knew there was no Santa. These are all the candies Mom had coupons for."

'If you keep walking, you'll save a hundred percent.'

"I signed up for a shopaholic class. It was a real bargain."

Lame Entertainment Book coupons.

'It's so frustrating -- all our coupons are expiring!'

'This coupon has expired, sir, and so have you.'

'I decided to start buying food in bulk. I hope you're hungry!'

"Do you have a dollar menu?"