Couples Therapy Warrior Gifts

"Well, Janet, it sounds like it's important to Ed, so maybe you could pay attention to how he did on every hole for at least the front nine."

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

Their marriage in jeopardy, Strawberry Shortcake and Billy Bob Banana Bread seek therapy.

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

"No, no - it was great. It's just that sometime I'd like to try it missionary style."

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

Relationship Warning Lights

She - Interpreter - He.

"I love it when we clear up issues between us."

'... And it's been ages since he last swashed his buckle!'

You got what you deserve … you deserve each other.

Battle of the sexes in a relationship

'Your inferiority complex is better than mine.'

'My brother's a proper cook - he's come as a witness'

"Y'know, I don't know what I'd do without her, but I'd sure like to find out."

"He refuses to talk and he never listens."

Two Rages Passing in the Night

"It's a major fixer-upper. How's your marriage?"

'Henry, we can't begin to make progress unless your friend leaves the room.'

'She seems to think I only have one thing on my mind.'

Your Home Remodel Team

Duvet nailed to the floor.

"I suppose we should start with listening skills!"

'While it's often said that laughter's a better medicine, I've learned that crying is best in solving disputes between husbands and wives.'

'We need to talk about your fear of commitment, Ralph.'

"I'm putting you on entry level anxiety meds."

'Have you two taken the COSMO 'compatibility test'?'

Express Therapy

"When I first met him, he was my knight in shining armour. But, he hasn't been near the metal polish in years!"

Personal Relationship Counsellor

"See how controlling he is?!"

Richard and Wendy Kozier, of Saddle River, New Jersey, with U.N. Peacekeeping Contingent

"Agreed. We'll reduce our arsenal of insults, jibes and grievances by one-third but will be permitted to stockpile them for use should the need arise."

"You see?"

A woman thinks of flowers and a man thinks of a prison cell.