Couples Therapist Enthusiast Gifts

"You used to love the way I annoyed the hell out of you."

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

Their marriage in jeopardy, Strawberry Shortcake and Billy Bob Banana Bread seek therapy.

Licensed Therapist

"I bought it off the therapist who's helping me kick my compulsive shopping disorder."

"No, no - it was great. It's just that sometime I'd like to try it missionary style."

Support group therapy for male black widow spiders.

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

"I know it’s an issue, and we’re working on it in therapy."

"Postwar is hell."

Relationship Warning Lights

Couples' therapy

'...and now, Gentlemen, we come to our final lecture in advanced cardiology...'

'I haven't been able to come to grips with it. My hands are too small.'

"I sometimes think you're the only one who listens to me."

"OK, fine. Perhaps 'sower of discord in the lower depths of hell' was overstating it."

She - Interpreter - He.

"Oops! I just deleted all your files. Can you repeat everything you've ever told me?"

Incompatible.

'... And it's been ages since he last swashed his buckle!'

'We have three minutes left.'

"It's hard not to take a mutiny personally."

"Homosapius amorius... the common lovebirds."

'I find that a live rhinoceros rather than an invisible elephant speeds things up considerably.'

'I get the feeling you're wagging your tale on the outside and crying on the inside.'

Battle of the sexes in a relationship

You got what you deserve … you deserve each other.

'Why can't they call it a deer, or a squirrel market?'

Shrinks in heaven

"Just what emotion is your emotional support dog supporting?"

"Freud doesn't work for you, so I', going to try some Dr. Anthony Fauci..."

"Y'know, I don't know what I'd do without her, but I'd sure like to find out."

'The way we met was interesting. I opened my wallet and there she was!'

Two Rages Passing in the Night