Couple's Counselor Fan Gifts

Couple sitting on a sofa with a filing cabinet marked 'issues' between them.

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

"I love it when we clear up issues between us."

"I recommend that you two find a way to spice up your shelf life."

'I don't know...they all look like cows to me.'

'Mona Lisa, would it make you happy if I gave you a foot massage every night?'

"There! Now we're getting somewhere."

"Tell me more about your imposter syndrome."

Personal Relationship Counsellor

Couple beyond prayer - need divine intervention.

'Typical bloody man, you've no idea what loyalty means...it's just self, self...self!'

A woman thinks of flowers and a man thinks of a prison cell.

'Sharing the same skin-type is fine. But, as a basis for a stable marriage...'

'So, when did you first realise that you fancied me rotten?'

'First, I'll give you my side of the story...then, the wimp will give you his...'

"The words 'complete screwball' are not in my vocabulary."

"....one minute I'm there - chewing the cud - the next, I get this urge to lead!"

'My wife doesn't understand me.'

"After 20 years of marriage, don't you think it's time you stopped calling your husband 'that Harold person'?"

'Don't you be dissing the Ho' now!'

'I know we're supposed to be Lovebirds, but a bit of privacy from time to time would be nice...'

'It's not just his insane jealousy - he also insists on choosing all my clothes.'

"I thought I could change him but he's the same dog he's always been."

'It'll get better, Vinny - my marriages always have a bad first quarter.'

Weight of the world on your shoulders.

Man sleeps instead of reading 'The Art of Listening.'

"Yes, this is exactly how wars start—because of someone's insensitivity!"

Evolution of love

'It's all right. You're allowed to get up on this couch.'

Arguments Won: Her and Him.

'I thought being married to a rodeo clown would be more fun.'

Early career fair

'I'm you from thirty years in the future. I've come back to tell you not to do it!'

"How come you only loosen up when you've got a cold?"

"I feel we've had a good session today."