Country Nostalgist Gifts

'Shee-yoot. Now we ain't even a one-horse town.'

"Hello, son. I suppose chicken farming doesn't seem so bad now."

"Can't we ride off in another direction?"

Farmer and FIsherman

Remember my mum? I took that photo a week before she died. There's one of me...that was a good haircut.

"This isn't the big city anymore, Jim. I'm the facilitator now."

"I like New York, but I miss sleeping drunk on my front lawn."

"Relax. They're just crows."

About time!

'At least they can't touch the village local' say two country gents. The pub now has a sign on the window saying 'This is now a smoke free pub, also no dogs or horsey types!'

An English Gold Field

...Well I've got to make sure I REALLY like where I am.

For every moment in life there is a song that describes it perfectly.'

'You had me at OOOO-AARRR!'

A newspaper stand in a rural area.

'The one that really gets them is a quick jab from the floor, straight back and out.'

'I should've never sold my truck when I moved to the city.'

I love the way barbecues take you back to nature.

"Someday, son, all this will be yours..."

'If only Darwin could have seen this!'

This is probably the only time that Clem's name and the title 'Ph.D' will be used in the same sentence.

"Well, well, looks like we got ourselves a coupla city types here, and a couple more city types right behind 'em, and a whole mess o' city types transferrin' to the Queens-bound F train."

"Sorry for the racket, but, I ask you, how are ya gonna keep 'em down on the farm after they've seen 6-B?"

What's your returns policy on faulty goods?

Pastoral Choirs

'Ma, come see what just crawled out of the woodpile.'

"I've never trusted cows."

'What's the night life-like?

"You are sooooo 'grazed!'"

'After this my bath water will never seem the same!'

The old colonel wished he was in the land of cotton.

WHO THREW THAT?

People fishing and relaxing