Country Nostalgist T-Shirts

'Shee-yoot. Now we ain't even a one-horse town.'

"Hello, son. I suppose chicken farming doesn't seem so bad now."

Amusement Park Fun (Country Style).

"Can't we ride off in another direction?"

Farmer and FIsherman

Remember my mum? I took that photo a week before she died. There's one of me...that was a good haircut.

"This isn't the big city anymore, Jim. I'm the facilitator now."

"I like New York, but I miss sleeping drunk on my front lawn."

"Relax. They're just crows."

About time!

'At least they can't touch the village local' say two country gents. The pub now has a sign on the window saying 'This is now a smoke free pub, also no dogs or horsey types!'

An English Gold Field

'You had me at OOOO-AARRR!'

For every moment in life there is a song that describes it perfectly.'

...Well I've got to make sure I REALLY like where I am.

A newspaper stand in a rural area.

"Well, the hills were alive with the sound of music...I'm sure!"

'I should've never sold my truck when I moved to the city.'

'The one that really gets them is a quick jab from the floor, straight back and out.'

I love the way barbecues take you back to nature.

"Someday, son, all this will be yours..."

This is probably the only time that Clem's name and the title 'Ph.D' will be used in the same sentence.

'If only Darwin could have seen this!'

Pastoral Choirs

"Sorry for the racket, but, I ask you, how are ya gonna keep 'em down on the farm after they've seen 6-B?"

'Ma, come see what just crawled out of the woodpile.'

What's your returns policy on faulty goods?

"Well, well, looks like we got ourselves a coupla city types here, and a couple more city types right behind 'em, and a whole mess o' city types transferrin' to the Queens-bound F train."

I suppose industrial pollution is the price of progress, but I still miss that old world atmosphere.

"I've never trusted cows."

'What's the night life-like?

The old colonel wished he was in the land of cotton.

"You are sooooo 'grazed!'"

'After this my bath water will never seem the same!'

"Where was I?"