Small Town Nostalgist T-Shirts

'Entering Simsdale.....'

"I like New York, but I miss sleeping drunk on my front lawn."

1989 Map Of Sorghum Corners, Ohio

Welcome to Yellow Pages, Vermont

'I should've never sold my truck when I moved to the city.'

"It's a sad state of affairs when Lever House begins to seem like a warm old friend."

"Ooh look, the high street's evolved to survive!"

Welcome to a Sleepy Little Town - name available on request.

"Well, well, looks like we got ourselves a coupla city types here, and a couple more city types right behind 'em, and a whole mess o' city types transferrin' to the Queens-bound F train."

The old colonel wished he was in the land of cotton.

"It's great having all the space, but Dan has been missing the city a bit."

'Mom calls this a diary where you write private thoughts no one else can see. What fun is that?'

It was so quiet in town the residents took to taking chairs to the corner so they could watch the traffic lights change.

A call to save energy, based loosely on the style of second world war posters

Church in the year 2035.

"It's where I grew up, Diane. A sleepy little town where everybody knows what everybody else is doing, and blogs about it 24/7!"

road sign: "Gilkers Corners Population 926

Life before fitness trackers.

"I'm not sure what we're seeing but I think it's some kind of antique milking machine."

West Fester needs to get with it! Sorry, Twig. We like it dull. Tuba concert. We want quiet, steady citizens. Isn't that discrimination? Only against exciting folks. We welcome boring persons of all races, creeds and sexual orientations. Wow! A rainbow of monotony.

Smalltown, U.S.A.

Entering Yoke.

"We were a once proud nation of shopkeepers!"

'Me? I'm from a one horse town. . . It was incredibly lonely.'

Do you remember when all we had to do was go to the filing cabinet and take out the file?

"Don’t look now, Artie, but there’s a Starbucks where your favorite shrub used to be."

'This is one of the few things you still can't do off-line.'

"It's a small town with a very small budget!"

'Shee-yoot. Now we ain't even a one-horse town.'

Welcome signs 'Mediocre, Illinois, home of absolutely nothing at all'

Farmer's Office Cubicle

Subway Series

The delightful process of dressing in a bathing-machine

"This is the close-knit town where a grisly murder reveals a dark secret...."

Farm boy about to go swimming in cattle water tank.