Cosmic Overseer T-Shirts

"I have the whole universe to look after, so I'm putting you in charge of this planet."

"This year we decided to vacation on the 3rd rock."

'But what is the universe for?'

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

"It's the dawn of a new era"

"Whatever it is, we're up to our necks in it!"

Right, this is the map of all the UFO sightings. Hold the light steady love.

"...Ooh, I wanna know more about your dark side!"

"He's got great velocity but his trajectory needs work."

'We studied the Big Dipper and the Little Dipper today. May I have an ice cream cone?'

"Stargazing sure is less painful at night."

"See? A huge surge in all the major crowdfunding sites right before the Big Bang!"

Mars Poppins

Leaving a Real Impression: That's one small step for (a) man, one giant leap for mankind.

"Going to Mars sounded like fun. Do you think we can get dad to finance it?"

"If the stars should appear one night in a thousand years, how would men believe and adore, and preserve for many generations the remembrance of the city of God which had been shown! … Emerson" "Good boy!"

An alien dog hangs its head out the flying saucer.

Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, in all the solar systems, in all the galaxies, in all the universe, she walks into mine.

'Of course the Johnsons got the big cloud.'

Space shuttle helping to unlock the secrets of the universe.

Are you interested in UFOs? Advanced life forms? Free medical screenings? Alternative underwear? Snacks and refreshments? Non-sexual turtles? Reverse pound cake? Science? Join us.

"I'm dating a lunar astronaut!"

You Will Have a Merry Christmas. . . Resistance is Futile.

Why Radio Astronomers often strike out.

God passing the time.

God's Sticky Notes

Trying to describe the size of the Big Bang.

'The good news is, I did find the jumper cables!'

"Dad, tell us a scary meteorite story."

How Patrick Moore chooses a hotel..."Hmmm four stars".

"Do you think it's a form of greeting?"

"Saturn. No contest. A deadly, treacherous gas giant ringed by a gossamer halo of ice. It symbolizes both death and life. Both evil and good. It symbolizes existence itself."

"A study finds that there are billions of earth-like planets in our galaxy."

'Fred, rumor has it you're closing in on some profound, elemental truth about the universe, and I wanted to remind you that our research funding specifically prohibits that!'