Corporate Matchmaker Pillows

'Are you thinking what I'm thinking?'

I asked you here because I like the job you're doing. It's too bad you don't work for this firm.

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

"Oh, God, no, please, no, God, no..."

"I met him on an online dating site. He was on their 'return' section."

"Sure, it's more efficient. But I still miss shooting the arrows."

"O.K. I'm just feeding in your personal details for a suitable match..."

"And there was I thinking you'd been Beta tested."

"Have you tried carbon dating?"

'Jane, cancel all my appointments for the rest of the week.'

"You may be in love, but can you support my daughter on what a herring makes?"

'Okay, but not in person -- I prefer on-line dating.'

"That whole internet dating thing....It killed me, I tell ya."

"When the dating agency said you were full of beans..."

cuPad

Today's love

"It must have been fate that brought us together."

"She says you sound like 'fun'!"

'Sir, you wanted an affectionate date capable of long term friendship...you said nothing about being allergic to fleas.'

They knew they were made for each other when their eyes met from across the room at the Same Socks Bar,

'You and Phil make a great couple. You're perfect for each other!'

"I don' want another weather forcaster - they're too unpredictable."

Acme Dating Service

Cupid

'This one writes some fine lyrics, and the other one has composed some beautiful music, but they just done't seem to hit it off as collaborators.'

"...and if anyone here suspects that the algorithm that put these two together might be flawed, speak now..."

"AI can now scan dating sites and find your best match."

Match maker

'Top is right! He's a scaffolder working on a tower block'

"Ironically, I think I'm experiencing job burn out!"

"I did warn you. Mum can take her time warming to a new boyfriend."

Sidekick speed matching service.

"Nothing works with this guy. Would you like us to shoot the pool guy?"

'Dream-dates don't normally go for nightmares.'

"The big challenge now is to get them to mate in captivity."