Cornflake Lover Gifts

'This corn's got dandruff.'

Any time is cake o'clock

Skiing.

'Been Away?' A piece of bread looks at a piece of brown toast as if it's got a suntan.

"Oh, God, no, please, no, God, no..."

Snow flake

Revenge of the Jelly Mother.

Always empty your fridge before starting a diet.

'The doctor's gonna have to wire your mouth shut for a month... but guess what! If you're brave, I'll give you this lollipop when he's done!'

Drink for me and my hot mamma. Now! We don't serve beer. Latte. Two, punk! Decaf. You don't want to see him angry. Also, low-foam and soy milk would be great. You don't want to see him gassy. Can I get one of those little Twizzler sticks to stir it with? Cube of brown sugar, please. And one nonfat blueberry scone! Two! I'd like to see how John Wayne would've ordered a fancy coffee drink.

'Take my tip,sonny and say it with jelly babies.'

In case of Emergency: Break Glass

"5 chocolate brownies, 3 banana muffins, 4 caramel cookies and one cappuccino - skinny."

"Candy wuld be nice onice in a while."

10 Good Things about a Minnesota Winter.

"Dessert?""No thanks, I'm stuffed."

"I've had it with you guys! From now on, have your arguments on your own time!"

'The body is made up of millions and millions of crumbs.'

'Of course it's safe. It has no preservatives, no additives, no artificial coloring...'

Yo ho ho!

"Since you're going to the dentist, I bought you a giant lollipop to go out in style."

You know, the snowballs we get in the summer are better. They're flavored!

'The following programme contains scones of a sexual nature.'

'Guess how many I ATE.'

You're the icing on my cupcake!

'What can you get with a quarter?'

"Don't take the ones with teeth marks. They've got hard centres ."

"What a load of hocus-pocus!"

'No, you can't have a stick of Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerrychwrudobwllanstisiliogogogoch rock. I'll get you on in Rhyl.'

'See, Dad. I told you these gummy worms would work.'

"I love this ghost costume because it covers this costume. I remove it and go back for seconds!"

Piñata Walk

How Piñatas Are Born

"Someone has eaten our porridge, let's have pancakes."

"Look lively crew, lest we be dashed upon these scrumptious shores."