Cool Climate Enthusiast Gifts

"Somewhere, anywhere cold."

Winter Coat Check at a Tropical Destination's Airport

"Me, as soon as I'm old enough, I'm out of here! I'll go and join my older brother: he's a beach bum in San Diego, California..."

This Halloween, use props to create a unique jack-o-lanern. Fitness buffs might like a jumping jack. Or you could carve a lumberjack. In colder climates, Jack Frost might be a nice choice. And for something functional, build a jack!

Global Warming.

'Sales meltdown...global warming...coincidence? I think not!'

I'D RATHER BE IN MIAMI, 'Oognik, I'd like to talk to you about your attitude...'

Football fan

"Business has picked up since we introduced short term cryogenic stays for the football off season."

Cold Enough to Freeze Brass Monkeys.

'It looks like we might get some rain ahead.'

'Well, shoot. Now Uncle Hector's caught in the ice! It's enough to make you want to move to Florida.'

"The cause of your illness is the approaching winter."

'...and the temperature is controlled by a thermostat which keeps it at a controlled zero year round.'

"And unlimited freezer space, naturally..."

'Congratulations on winning Weather Forecaster of the Year, you rotten swine!'

'The temperature isn't too bad at -15, but when you add on the wind chill factor... '

Why don't you look at ME that way?

'Honey, I'm looking fat in white!' 'Trust me, dear. In a few months, the pounds will be melting away.'

After the incident with Coach McKracken the Arctic Football League banned drink dumping.

igloo smoking zone...

"I see Linda and Gay moved back from down South. I knew that wouldn't last."

'Am I shivering or giggling?'

'Yes, we could use someone with your talents!'

Igloo Building.

Eskimo asks, 'Was it good for you?'

You're right. Winter in Florida sounds better every year.

"We switched over. It’s cheaper, and polls show sinners are far more miserable in a cold climate."

'California: Here I come!'

'The wisdom of life is to grow older in a warm climate.'

"I'm so sorry, I didn't realize the water balloons had already frozen..."

Explorer receiving a Valentine from a penguin.

A Present form Saudi Arabia.

"Sure, the Antarctic waters are great feeding grounds, but can we try tropical waters next time?"

'That's easy for you to say, you like cold weather.'