Connoisseurs Of Life's Paradoxes Gifts

Destinations

"Think outside the box but never forget who owns the box."

"This just in: one of us always tells lies; the other always tells the truth. Who's who? Stay tuned."

'Massive unpredictability is absolutely certain, maybe.'

"Would you describe the pain everyone else causes you as dull and throbbing or sharp like a knife?"

"Oh well - same shit, different day. . .!"

'The Human Comedy needs a laugh track.'

Department of Philosophy. Free Why-Fi.

"I found another great book about living with less stuff."

Gym/Tan/Donut

Philosophy Dept: Are you really here?

Ironic Tornado

"David Bowie, dead. Keith Richards, alive. Makes no sense."

You can't go back.

'I'm leaving, I want to see the world. I can't stay here and spend my life watching grass grow!'

"Do you have a minute for a problem whose solution has eluded humanity since the dawn of civilization?"

"Oh, darn, and just as I was beginning to take charge of my life."

Zeno Gives Directions

'Geeez! One day, we'll all get killed by that unhealthy stuff!'

Passage of Time

'These shooting sticks are not very comfortable!'

Members of the National Nonconformist Society all have the same clothing on.

"No, yours is more useful, believe me."

Type 'G' for guru

Area Of Outstandingly Radioactive Waste

"We've come a long way since the me-and-now society."

'I'm not a guru. I just had the worst divorce settlement in history.'

A sleepy looking driver waits for a passenger in a sleepy looking car.

'It's the one thing that can always find me...my alumni newsletter.'

'Not only did life pass me by, it HIP-CHECKED me!'

'What's your wallet and keys doing in the refrigerator?'

'Do you ever get the feeling there has to be more to life?'

"They say hair and fingernails keep growing, but phone calls taper off."

Nothing Good Ahead

"Where are we? None of this stuff is even on the map!"