Congressional Hopeful Gifts

'He thought he was making a bid for congress.'

'Look dear, he's writing political speeches.'

'Ah, it's so precious to witness a child learn how government actually works...'

"Hey, there's Sara, padding her college-entrance résumé!"

'I would love to run for class president, but I'm concerned about the vetting process. I once faked sleep during nap time in pre-school.'

'Danae's spent all this week writing new amendments, which I can only assume means she doesn't know what it'll take to get them into the constitution...so I sent her a link on the process...'

'I've changed my mind...I want to grow up to be a politician.'

'I'm so proud of Trevor for getting an early start on his negative campaign for Student Council.'

'Wow! no doubt about it son!...You'll grow up to be President of the United States!'

America's Biggest Export...

"Maybe we apply as a group....crowdsourcing employment."

"I'm thinking of getting into office politics."

I'm freaking out! Thursday is dress rehearsal. Nerves? Work! I've got a math and history test on Friday. Why did I ever sign up for the spring musical? Because it's fun? West Fester High School. On my college application it'll look like I had fun. It'll go with your "Looks aren't important" essay.

I don't need to know any math --- I'm going to be a politician.

'I still love you, Harold, but I'm moving to another state and running for the Senate.'

'Your excuses for not doing your homework are excellent. How about a career as political apologist?'

'The greenest government ever?'

"I'll just mow the lawn then I'll put myself forward to lead the Conservatives."

Student Council. Ernie's no longer on the student council, but he's sticking around as a lobbyist.

"Honk If You're Running For Governor!

"Eat your borscht. Don't you want to be President of the Soviet Union when you grow up?"

'Don't worry too much about math, science, or history -- just make sure you get good marks in rhetoric.'

'I'm sorry but we don't have athletic scholarships for video games.'

'I'd like to run for class president but I don't want to put my family through a background check.'

'I'm considering a run for class president. Do we have any skeletons in our closet I should first know about?'

"When I grow up, I'm going to be a business owner, or president, or the doctor who discovers the cure for cancer!"

'Okay, son -- I'll tell you one more campaign promise, and then off you go to sleep.'

'Instead of being just like Michael Jordan, I wanna be just like Barack.'

"It's all set. We both have enough credits to go to college."

'It's 'any little boy CAN grow up to be President ' -- It's not a REQUIREMENT.'

"Dad's just giving Timmy some guidance as to how the party's manifesto commitments may result in a fiscal drag on GDP growth targets..."

You should read a book once in a while, Al. Where do you think you'll end up by spending all your time on the internet? The White House?

"He's my running mate."

"Was that your first foray into politics?"

'Yes, dad, I mis-spoke my math grade, covered-up my reprimand from the dean, and cheated on an English quiz, but I'm getting an A in political science.'