Confusion Enthusiast Gifts

'Surely somebody must know why we're here?'

'One letter at a time.'

Exit next left. No, my left.

"You remind me of someone. Oh, yeah, him"

"Hi, Honey, I think I'm home."

"Why won’t you just admit you forgot where you parked the car?"

"I'm just saying, isn't it a bit early to be 'the present moment'?"

'I'm a say what I say and mean what I mean kind of guy... I mean, a say what I mean and mean what I say kind of guy.'

'What hours did you do at your last job?' - '8 til 4' - 'How was it?' - 'Alright. It was a bit like 9 til 5...' - '...except I started an hour earlier and finished an hour earlier.' - 'No... no... brain... pain...'

Worm - "...wait a minute! Are you...? Am I talking to the right end?!"

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

'Mysteries' section of bookshop reveals secret door.

'Thanks to the internet it is now possible to be extremely well-informed and completely wrong at the same time!'

Victoria's pre-marriage questionnaire continues...'Can I get input from the guys at the bar on this one?'

The Shed Mystery: 'Ah! There you are! Ok, that's enough...time to go ho...uh...wait...what the...?'

"That was totally....what's the word I'm looking for?"

"Quoth the raven, 'Nevermore.'"

Clever visual metaphor used to personify the abstract concept of thought and memory.

The Department of Mystery - No one really knows who we are or what we do, including us.

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

'Does sports trivia count as something I learned today?'

"'A body at rest'? -- Are you writing murder mysteries now, Isaac?"

"The problem with these instructions is that they assume I have the attention span to actually read something."

Weatherman: "Tonight's weather forecast is confusing, followed tomorrow by downright bewildering."

'Mark my word, Walters, this is no ordinary virus.'

Channelling on the Cheap

"Maybe our beloved founder is trying to tell us something."

Whodunnit. Whoreallydunnit.

Dreams I have had...

Acme-5000 Lie Detector

The Big Book of Suspicious Crawl Spaces

'Yes, they were using it to clean up the graffiti!'

'I'm going to add to the confusion. I'm going to sign my name upside-down.'