Conference Comic Gifts

'No, you haven't missed much. Pretty well everyone called in sick.'

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"Don't get strung out by the way I look, don't judge a book by its cover."

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

Inclusive speech

The interested bystanders.

"Nervous about this morning's presentation?"

Superheroes take a selfie

'Complete sentences?? Jeez, how verbose can you get?'

'So what are you studying, young man?'

Mayhem, Inc. Part 21

"Check it out! The big Comic-Con starts this week!"

"Unless one is a humorist, Haskins. One should avoid attempts at humor."

"I love these off-site business meetings."

'Well ladies and gentlemen, I'm sure my little talk has made you all think'

"I don't think the guy with the business-card cannon has ever been to an actual networking event,"

"Don't tell me, first time away from home, right?"

'Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking...'

"Thank God! Someone to network with!"

Official Fight Cards

'I understand they specialize in acquisitions.'

'It's easy, Greg. Just get in touch with your inner regional sales manager.'

Malaprop Man! Adventures. Malaprop Man! Where have you been? At a stupor her comet confection! Did many of your fellow heroes show up? We had a great turnabout! Backman and the Incredible Bulk were there! So was Caption Americ, the Flush, Wander Woman and Plasterman! Very impressive. Who was the most popular with the fans? I think I was the main distraction! I have no doubt at all about that!

"Good boy, what a good boy. You're hired."

"We serve danishes because that's just how I roll!"

'Natalie, would you please bring me the buzzword du jour?'

Wearing a sales chart as a name badge.

Conference Pears

World Food Summit - No food and drink allowed in the auditorium.

"As the new head coach, my first move will be to blow up the entire roster."

'Time management seminar. Start: five-ish.'

"I think I see a miscreant in the carpark. There's no time to call the police I must deal with it myself."

'I want to see more blue sky thinking.'

'Is that a suspicious package in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?'