Cone Of Shame Enthusiast Pillows

"Just what I like: the tall and silent type"

"No surgery. I'm just trying to hide a pimple."

"I know we've had our differences in the past but if you scratch behind my ears I'll show you where the catnip is kept."

Dog wearing a cone

"Fill it up!"

Sign at vet's says 'Cat's waiting area'. Cat says to dog with head in cone: 'Oi, mate, can't you read?'

Dog Walker

Shaved Ice

"The vet made me wear this, and I can't lick my balls...uh...could I lick yours for awhile, Rex?"

'No need to shout.'

"I know I said, 'If there's anything I can do,' but I draw the line on licking your incision for you."

'If it's any consolation, I'm having him fixed next week.'

"Fill it up!"

"Someone at this address is intercepting foreign hacking codes."

They say I get 152 channels.

Puppy Love

"Laugh if you want, but I have my phone in here."

'I wish I could scratch my ears.'

"I'll take it off if you promise not to pick at the stitches."

"For goodness sake, I don't need to do a new risk assessment each time I cut a new tree..."

'So, you've been under the knife as well?'

"I couldn't pull it off. Looks good on you, though."

'Well that's what you get for picking your scab. . .'

'I can't lick my itchy bum, but I have amazing hearing!'

'Look on the bright side. It adds a cool echo effect to your bark.'

"Really? You're going to use that to catch candy?"

"They say I get 152 channels."

'Were you out drinking last night?'

The Cone Ranger