Condo Enthusiast Gifts

'If it was mine, I'd put it up for sale, invest the proceeds, and get myself a nice little condo.'

The Golden Age of Marking Territory

"The woman on the fire escape who acted like it was a balcony"

Fish-tank Skyscraper.

The Day Dreamer.

Upper West Side Story

Do you like to talk about Real Estate? Like to meet other men and women who do? Dial the... REAL-ESTATE HOTLINE

"This condo includes free access to fitness facilities...7 flights of stairs."

'We like to spend 51 weeks of the year at our Florida holiday home...'

Real Estate Personals

'Honey, I'm home.'

Natural Phenomena of 15-E

For the musician strapped for space...the Murphy piano.

"It just seems to me, Howard, that you're missing the whole point of having a terrace in the city."

'Now, it does require some modernisation. . . .'

Yeah? Delivery! Come on up!

'They're playing house.'

"Factominiums."

"My kitchen is very small. Do you have any with doors that swing in?"

'I think you'll all rest easy knowing this is a gated community!'

"That's the window, dear. The bookcase is over to your right."

UP Again: Housing Prices.

From Ant Farm to Ant Condo

Leslie would regret bringing her cat to the pet store.

Estate Agent - 'They're all mine.'

'You can come back in, King Kong. The superintendent got the door open.'

New Homes

"If a sixth borough opens up, I'll let you know."

William and Real Estate

"...there's honey all over the walls, a weird buzzing noise 24 hours a day and some weird broad at the end of the hall thinks she's the queen!"

Real estate.

Turtle Eviction

'Want a new house? Time to start groveling again.'

Mortgages up 'Where?'

'According to my owner, buying this home was cheaper than building me one.'