Computer Whiz In A Suit Gifts

"As an attorney half my time is spent in court. The rest is evenly split between sitting at my computer and looking for parking."

"I've just been offered a job sorting out the Y1K bug.."

Multi-tasking.

Need Supercomputer to finish my PhD, Please Help.

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

'This computer has a fast modem, the latest Pentium, increased RAM, a huge hard drive and broadband connections. Only one problem...slow pointer fingers.'

'WE use these computers to gather and organise data for our school district and, on a slow day, to play solitaire.'

'Yep,that's it Mr.White. And NOW go, Control-Alt-Delete, then re-enter.'

'My dog ate my computer.'

GO AHEAD ... MAKE MY DAY!

STRIP Hambone: Workers help is a hindrance

"I hate you! You don't understand me and you don't understand my software!"

"After a long day at the office writing business software...Bob loves to relax writing game software."

'...And, from what I understand, they don't have any hard drive at all.'

"When they said progress made our replacement inevitable I thought they meant by AI."

'Those enormous worldwide internet communities.'

"The results are impressive, but it'll be decades before we can transmit and receive pornography."

Input From The Front Office

"I love the fact that you're a computer genius, Erwin. I just don't like fact that you look like one."

"Now that we have these Earthlings in our power, we can take over this planet!"

Computer making faces behind owner's back.

I've always been slower than computers...

'Quick, press control Z!'

"What's that you're reading?"

'Hey, everyone! Guess who forgot his password?'

"My fit watch has conspired with the TV remote. The remote only stays on some fitness channel until I get up and exercise."

"A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer."

"He's at that awkward age...he knows just enough about computers to really screw them up."

"Are you sure you updated the anti-virus software?"

'Your car should run fine now. I reformatted the hard drive, increased the ram, scanned for viruses, updated the firmware, upgraded to this year's processor...'

Washroom Doors: Men, Women, Computer Whiz.

Kevin had a computer virus.

"They found a defect in the new chip. Looks like someone was asleep at the itty-bitty, teeny-weeny switch."