Completing Surgical Residency Gifts

"That's an awfully large small intestine and an awfully small large intestine."

"Remember the hierarchy of competence - see one, do one, teach one, become a regulator."

Dancing Doctor

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

'It may be more inconvenient, but the 'Reverse Prostate Exam' is a lot less embarrassing for the both of us.'

'What's holding him up?'

"Gross."

"You're sick of this? Just try to imagine how we feel."

"Turn your head and cough."

Current location

The importance of paying attention in med school.

"That's enough about the noggin and the schnoz. Let's move on to the tummy-wummy and the keister."

'No, no, no. Shout 'clear' BEFORE zapping him.'

'Gastroenterology...do I know that?'

Doctor surrounded by notes.

Doctor sleeps in a patients bed.

'Four years of medical school and three years of residency, and you come bothering me with the sniffles?'

'You're excused. Anyone else feel too squeamish to witness the procedure?'

'There are some things they don't teach you in medical school. I think you've got one of those things.'

"Well, there's nothing in the rules that says baboons can't perform surgery, so what the hey, let's give him a shot."

'The position will be a success if you're not suing me.'

"Over here, by the whatchanacalalit...somebody get the anatomy book."

"If you find anything else wrong, just go ahead and fix it."

'Sponge diving, Bob?'

'He's playing 'Doctor'.'

"Now I'm going to offer a second opinion."

Recycling Bin in Operating Theatre

Gynecology pigeon hole

'You're wrong...this is brain surgery.'

It's not catching, is it? - The doctor hates to catch things.

'What wine goes with the Hippocratic Oath- my nephew graduated from medical school.'

'If you're so easily grossed out, why did you go to medical school?'