Complaints Gifts

Man at complaints window gets redirected to the next window.

Mousetrap serves for pushbutton in complaint department.

Man from refuse department says: 'We'll send you a new wheelie bin, Mrs Trubshaw, there's really no need to 'orchestrate a mass Twitter campaign'.'

Customer Service. I only handle complaints -- What you have is a beef?

"You want to complain about bureaucracy? Well..."

"He has a bureaucratic theory of evolution - 'Survival of the compliant.'"

Complaints Department.

Cooling off period? I'm so cold I'll probably never use your company again!

A Dog Who Never Got His Day.

'Nobody told me that I had to buy something before I could complain about it. That's what I want to complain about.'

"True, the fly is not in my soup. But it took one taste of my soup and dropped dead."

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

Flyfishing for dummies.

'To hear our privacy policy, please tell us you credit card and social security numbers...'

"Whine and cheezed party."

"Providing great customer care is of course important, but shall we start with how you manage forms TG-45S through to NSD-89b."

'A word of advice, the squeaky wheel gets the totally organic, 0 trans-fat, soy-based lubricant.'

"What a day. I almost lost my smug look of detached superiority."

Complaints Desk

'Typical, I hadn't finished complaining about the rain...'

"I've got your letter in front of me now, sir."

Meeting at the Grumpy Old Men's Pub.

"I said FETCH! Not KVETCH!"

'This decaf's lousy.'

"Before you speak to the manager, we want to congratulate you on being our one millionth irate customer."

'It's Mr. Stebbins...he's getting back to you with a vengeance.'

"Is it always so cloudy?"

"Frankly, I can't really understand why my husband would be referred to as a "Domestic Cat": he does nothing around the house..."

'I don't like to complain, Evelyn, but aren't these family reunions getting out of hand?'

"In what way do you feel you have been unfairly treated?"

Complaints about how we handled your complaint.

Bob's whine cellar.

"You say that life is suffering, but isn't it also complaining?"

'No, we don't take complaints, we SELL complaints.. If the sign said POPCORN, you wouldn't try to GIVE me popcorn, would you?'

'Of course I care, madam!'