Competitive Shoppers Gifts

'You say you broke 100 in golf? I did it at the store.'

I thought you said Megson couldn't be bought.

Sale.

"The only thing that's not gone up is the pound."

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

"No, we can't get you a new toy every time we go shopping."

"The Box is bigger, the contents smaller, increased the price and called it improved."

Customer Convention

Holiday Sales: The Starting Line

"Yes, but I'll know it's a recliner."

Shampoo and Salad Dressing.

"I'll throw in a few extra pinstripes."

"Consumer confidence remains high as long as we keep them distracted buying stuff."

STRIP Hambone: Expensive repair job

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations became savvy consumers, then they lived reasonably contented forever after.'

Crisis Buzz.

'I've got it written down...'

"Got any cards saying friendship is priceless under 5 bucks?"

"How will you be paying? Crypto, Venmo, electronic fund transfer, credit card, check, cash, precious metals, brightly colored shells or livestock?"

"Eeny, meeny, miney, mo.."

"I have no idea where we parked the car, or why we exist."

'And this one is just today's grocery list from my wife.'

"Why is this cart so heavy?"

"You want to go shopping in Lisbon? Honey, give me 10 seconds to sign the order to invade Portugal!"

Man on Stilts in a Market

"Class, welcome back Sean ... who, you may recall, was lost for eight days in Home Depot."

'But what do you sell?'

'Our definition of a 'bargain' is right there in the small print.'

'Our survey shows there's more confidence in shopping coupons than in the dollar...'

Shopping Torture

"You've got two more things to worry about now. You're mad and I'm expensive."

One Dollar, One Vote

'I'm sure I've forgotten something. I got change from a fifty.'

"I've got a lot of stuff, a ton of coupons, and I pay by check, so all you behind me...get comfortable!"

"Oh no. It's another death caused by 'economy pack syndrome'!"