Competitive Neighbor Gifts

Keeping up with the jones

"I need one louder than the one my neighbor's got."

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.

...And he calls himself the 'Green' Giant...

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

The Victors

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

"First time pruning?"

"We really need more perennials? Aren't my weeds and crabgrass enough?"

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

'We like the occasional drink on the patio.'

'Why can't my walks be that fun?'

"See? And you said you couldn't work from home."

"Maureen Alsop is leaving her magnolia, and her delphinium and her cats with us this weekend."

"We thought we would come somewhere remote to self-isolate."

Mixed Doubles.

$1: Family Secrets

Neighbor Leaf Wars

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

Canape?

'So glad you could make our vegetarian BBQ.'

"He loves his leaf blower."

Every so often, Madeline gets carried away.

"This is bishop’s weed — always pee on it. Tell your friends."

"Has the Wi-Fi seemed slow to you lately?"

"If you ask me, that sky looks awfully threatening!"

Annoying neighbours - irritating wind chimes

'This is the BEST well we've dug!!'

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

Thank you bubbles

"No, nothing wrong. Just a great excuse for not 'noticing' some folks."

'He has a big heart. . . inviting his homeless friends in to stay dry.'