Compatibility Thinker Pillows

"He's the perfect match for me of five years ago."

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

"We'll always have couples therapy."

'...when did you first get these feelings of wanting to be a psychiatrist?'

Playdough's The Republic

'Of course homosexuality is not a sin, handsome.'

"Space is curved and time is relative? Yeah, OK...I'm calling you a cab right now, buddy."

Hamlet

Always Compatible

'You know, if you had one of those bumper stickers, I wouldn't be in doggy-therapy.'

"And when you realized it was the wrong tree, why do you think you kept barking up it?"

Jimmy had a very active imagination.

'The Grand Jury doesn't understand me...'

"You used to be that ambitious."

'This is alphabet soup, Mom. I don't use the alphabet in the summer.'

'Fear of getting caught is understandable but fear of water, I think, requires counselling.'

Romance is more difficult for robots than it is for people. Sure, we can check for compatibility by comparing operating systems but until battery technology improves, all our relationships will be on-again, off-again. Worst of all, we can't handle passion. When the sparks are flying a romance blowup will follow.

“What if I tell you the card you are thinking of is … the Jack of Hearts ?”

It'll never work - you're LED and I'm plasma.

"On the weekend I finally beat the club pro...so I don't need you anymore!"

'My wife's therapist doesn't understand me.'

"O.K. What part of 'malignant regression and pathogenic reintrojection as a defense against psychic decompensation' don't you understand?"

"But it would be rude to raise taxes on my friends."

"I feel used."

"I feel like we're finally making progress."

"I don't know why I'm here - I don't need a haircut."

"This isn't a bad time to be out of touch with reality."

"I was born into the wrong color. I'm not pink, Oh, doc, I'm so depressed..."

"Don't be so gullible! - He can't EITHER call some mouse superhero with his wristwatch."

"He's all mine. Life is good."

Inclusive family code in Cuba

"I know marriage is a partnership, but I didn't realise I'd be the silent partner."

Introverted Chair

'Of course you're not a failure... you can afford my fees can't you?'

'Actually, I'm a placebo psychiatrist.'