Commute Conqueror Gifts

"Why isn't my car horn magically fixing everything?"

'Today I sold my first car and I'm really proud, boss. If only I diddn't have to go home by bus...'

"..We're going to attempt to commute into London by train."

'How come your hard days at the office are harder than anyone else's hard days at the office.'

Employees have 'carrot and stick' set-up with coffee, biscuits and pastries. Chairman says: 'These are a crucial part of our new campaign to get employees walking to work.'

The Off-Roading Commuter

"Every motorway in the country is clear except the southbound M3 which will remain at a standstill for the rest of the day."

'I just stuck my sign up. I don't know from where all the cars came.'

Twisted Peel cycles to work.

'On the good side though, it IS close to the office!'

"Time to wake up, Jim. It's Monday morning."

A blue collar cow.

"I had to take three buses and a cab to get here. Talk about a difficult transit!"

'You have to start leaving for work earlier. Even I beat you to the office this morning.'

Ask me about road rage.

It suddenly dawned on Gerald that he was a little premature returning to work after his stomach bug.

The screams

Portacubicle

'I love my job, but the commute is killing me.'

'I don't care if it is Christmas...I'm entering by the front door.'

Man sees driver on tail: 'Loony tailgaters!'

Monday morning is nigh.

'All the trains are knackered today... so get walking you lazy gits!'

Spontaneous volcanic eruptions and rubber neckers were snarling traffic.

'Lost you ticket!...That's nothing but a fare-based-lie!'

'I can't hear you - let's repeat the last ten minutes of our extremely irritating conversation'

Poodle bus

"Seven mile tailbacks...and in this heat. That must have been awful for you!"

"I think it's more aspirational than prescriptive."

Commutobile

King Commute - Return to work after Covid 19

"The city never fails to excite after two hours of traffic."

'My feet are killing me.'

'Hang in there, Larry, those endorphins will soon kick in.'

'Camping is nature's way of promoting B&Bs.'