Community Storyteller Gifts

'Hey, man! I was raised by a whole village, and I turned out okay!'

Sign: 'Welcome to Fernbanks. Beneath our quaint Norman Rockwell-ish exterior beats a big-box chain store heart, ready to sell out at the drop of a hat.'

'...and now the weather.'

Support your local bookstore

"Doris is ill today, so I'll be manning the News Desk."

True confessions.

'It's really more of a family forest than a family tree.'

The Family Joules: Part 21

"You know who's tougher than all your little superheroes? The fossil fuel industry."

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

Children's Party

"When I was young my parents couldn't afford to give me too much, too soon."

"No, son, you’re not ‘M for Mature.’"

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

"It seems like only yesterday that Dad told me I'll be an adult before I know it."

'Riley, I think it's time you learned the truth... You're adopted.'

"Tell us the one about swift justice, Grandpa."

'Wait a minute! What if this isn't just a puddle?! What if it's a huge, furious hibernating snowman?'

"Oh, she talk a lot...but only about her children."

'For God's sake give me some angst, how will I ever write a misery memoir?'

'You were a band geek?! Maybe Max will play an instrument!'

'How about having at least one character who's alive and wearing clothes?'

'It was a dark and stormy night. Also, there was a Catch-22.'

Man writing at laptop says: 'It's a UK road movie ??" to give it more scale, I'm making the characters three inches tall.'

"The last one is Uncle Charlie. He was pardoned in 1987."

"See those birch trees on the other side of the pond? That’s the exact spot where your mother first called me an idiot."

Wyatt returns home to visit his old small town.

"But our history was current events when you were at school Dad!"

"Well, I assume the three bears went in the woods like all bears do. May I continue?"

'He's great, he can even fetch the paper. Off the neighbour's step.'

'It is a big day! Ten years ago, yout dad joined the union!'

"Grandpa, how did you ever survive without apps?"

"Excuse me, Jerrod, but I'm leaving you for Paul's competing narrative."

"Well, Mr. Goddam Fancy-Pants Small-Town-Expose hot shot! What makes you think we don't all have lusty, kiss-and-tell memoirs boiling away inside us?"