Communication Expert Gifts

"Honey, wake up! I just remembered something you did that annoyed the hell out of me!"

"Hi. Steve Smith here. Just calling to say hello and touch base. Well, bye. Hi. Steve Smith here. Just calling to say hello and touch base. Well, bye. Hi..."

"We can't even agree on how cold it is."

Bob's timing was a little off.

'When I asked for your honest opinion of me, I didn't expect you to be THAT honest!'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"I'm in a meeting, can I call you back?"

'Of course I'm listening Dear: In fact, 'I'm all ears'...'

'As usual, when you type that, correct my grammar, and make me sound friendly and very intelligent.'

'Here you are - you've been thinking of taking up a new interest - improve your conversational skills.'

'He's great at communicating, but it's office gossip.'

'How can she tell that in only three minutes?'

The unfortunate night there were two talking sticks at the conflict resolution meeting.

"I'm bilingual. I can talk to parents and step parents."

"I'm not sure I like your body language, Geoffrey."

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

"You don't even ignore me anymore!"

"My wife and I do have words, but I don't get to use mine."

"Being married means never having to say you're sorry. It's presumed!"

"Apart from it being a **** pile of ***** with no **** idea about ****, were you happy with the service today?"

"He feels he communicates better exclusively through emojis. It's getting very annoying."

"There! Now we're getting somewhere."

"That last applicant showed real promise. Did you notice the way he mumbled all through the interview?"

'Remember, when we get in there, let me do all the talking.'

"I can't talk to him anymore. He's so...wireless remote!"

"Darn kids vaping again."

"I've got some 'wife mail' for you sir, on line 3."

'And that my friend is the end of that.'

ACME SCHOOL OF LIP READING, 'Before we begin, I'm required to warn you that there are things you're better off not knowing.'

'That's not true, I do listen. I'm just not very interested.'

'Are you thinking what I think you think I'm thinking?'

Fun at the Office #563: THE DAY THE TELEPHONES EXPLODED

Text your mother.

'I wouldn't worry too much about his communication skills....grunting is perfectly normal at his age!'

'then I told her I wasn't going to speak to her again until she stopped giving me the silent treatment. That was in 1996.'