Communication Experts Gifts

Changing Minds

". . . .Do you have a wifi password?"

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

"Peter's Joint Head of Communications."

Campaign for Plain English

"And isn't it time we replaced the worn-out, meaningless cliches in our mission statement with some dazzlingly new meaningless cliches?"

"National security adviser"

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

"Damn - another letter to the editor."

Dialogue

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

'In my time, we didn't talk to a blackberry. We just ate the damn things!'

Lies/Damned Lies/Social Media

"I was going to have my people call his people, but I’m pretty sure his people have Caller I.D."

"Everything you say (or don't say) matters. Choose your words and intentions carefully."

"....So called 'fake news' is dangerous to our democracy!"

Ruddy bloggers!

'Now that we've learned to talk, maybe we should establish some speech codes.'

"We live in the golden age of fake news, alternative facts and spin control. Your resume is too truthful."

'He bowed lower for me than for you.'

Information...political rhetoric

'I want to discuss communication clarity.'

'Stop emailing me, I am standing right here.'

"Oh! It's you! I was expecting the machine."

"'Grim Reapers' was considered too offensive, these days we're known as 'afterlife facilitators.'"

'Hi! I'm on the tree.'

"Twitter is back! Hurry, hurry, get yer free speech here!"

It's not a bad planet -- Their talk shows make it seem a lot worse than it is.

Torturing the English Language

"Well, after ad school, our Timothy made a 6-second Ad that nobody saw."

'I can't read their smoke signal. It's encrypted.'

"Miss Duxbury, put me through to someone."