Commitment Commander Pillows

Industry and Idleness - The industrious apprentice a favourite, and entrusted by his master.

Relationship Warning Lights

"She can walk the walk, but can she talk the talk?"

"What's this for poorer stuff?"

"I don't think you're taking this relationship seriously..."

"Y'know, I don't know what I'd do without her, but I'd sure like to find out."

"I want more than anonymous sex. I want anonymous intimacy."

'No, but thanks for asking.'

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. I thought we were just dating."

"I'll agree to a pre-nup if you'll agree to a non-compete clause."

A Reasonable Time for Concern

She agreed to marry me, but she has to marry three other guys first.

'Who has the rings and prenup?'

'I'm writing my New Year's resolutions.' - 'I resolve to finish everything that I start.'

"I don' want another weather forcaster - they're too unpredictable."

Marriage counselor, living together counselor or a just screwing around counselor.

"...and are you, Jessica, committed to this bit?"

"And do you, Courtney, take this man....Courtney!"

"Do you, Amanda and John, promise to watch yourselves, mind your Ps and Qs, and generally step on eggshells in this marriage, in order to somehow keep it up and running for as long as possible?"

"No, I don't think our marriage would benefit from a mission statement."

'On second thought, dear, could you toss me the car keys?'

'Wait a minute - This is getting too close for comfort.'

"Merely dating" "Lover's leap" "Undecided? Take a hike"

"Monogamy? In this economy?"

Marriage & Divorce.

'I'm sorry, but 'I'll see how I feel on the night' isn't really acceptable.'

"You will awake feeling refreshed...."

'And promise to love each other through constant drama, bad judgment, poor choices and self-delusion?'

'I now pronounce you husband vs. wife.'

"I agreed to 'for better' and 'for worse,' but never to 'for mysterious' and 'withholding'."

"I said to him eventually, I said marriage is something you're just going to have to do on your own."

"I did say I wanted to get married, but that was a false positive."

'I have an even better idea, Steve -- let's get married without living together!'