Commitment Comic Pillows

'Do you promise to have and to hold her, longer than the PS3?'

'Who has the rings and prenup?'

"It's an ankle monitor -- I didn't read the fine print in the pre-nup."

"Your parents added this line: 'You do solemnly pledge to stay together long enough to make the cost of this wedding worth it."

Just married and Just Single and Happy.

'Sometimes it's difficult to get their feelings to the surface.'

'...In functionality and in dysfunctionality....'

'...And then, I guess our relationship got TOO meaningful.'

'Why can't he just say 'I do'?'

"What I really wanted was a dog, but my landlord won't allow it. So I got married instead."

Unconditional Loveseat

I'm putting all my eggs in one basket.

"We don't have sex any more, we argue about money and you hate my mother. We should be married."

The Female Brain and The Other One

'Jen, you knew when you married me, I was a 'corporate report' reading person - Not a 'summer fiction' reading person.'

Industry and Idleness - The industrious apprentice a favourite, and entrusted by his master.

'Wait a minute -- you haven't said anything about a retirement age.'

Various Traps.

'Either you say 'I do' or you don't -- You can't plead nolo contendere.'

"After two years of dating, we decided it was finally time to move in together."

Frank and Ernie's Relationship Advice. It's not enough to just accept that relationships are two-way streets ... You must also avoid taking side trips down alleys!

'It's my wedding ring: My wife insists I wear it here to stop me flirting with other females...'

'I'm writing my New Year's resolutions.' - 'I resolve to finish everything that I start.'

"And do you, Courtney, take this man....Courtney!"

"Will you still love me when I'm old and past it?"

'Either you do or you don't - there isn't any 'cooling-off' period!'

"Do you, Amanda and John, promise to watch yourselves, mind your Ps and Qs, and generally step on eggshells in this marriage, in order to somehow keep it up and running for as long as possible?"

'Are you serious? I thought 'For Better or for Worse' was just a comic strip.'

"When we met, Marc promised to be the wind under my wings but it turned out to be all hot air."

"Are there any available upgrade options?"

'...Love, honor, and obey, no strings attached?'

"Yes, a surprise engagement. Even my husband-to-be here didn't know..."

"That's Ms Pitt. She's been entrenched on high alert at the front desk for 42 years."

'I'm sorry, but 'I'll see how I feel on the night' isn't really acceptable.'

'Wait a minute - This is getting too close for comfort.'