Commercial Commentary Fan Gifts

'I'm really getting tired of all these Christmas commercials.'

'The recession is over, again.'

Real Estate Krisp Flakes: Location! Location! Location!

I break for toilet paper

'She's dealing multiple prescriptions. This is the 3rd pharmacy today where she got these highly addictive Chocolate Bits.'

"It seemed bigger in the brochure."

How Will They Manage without Us?

"This guy looks like he's really out of touch."

Alpha males through the ages!

Lane restricted to cars with three or more persons at least one of whom is a woman or visible minority.

"She's genetically modified, you know."

"It's true she's back to the same weight she was on her wedding day, but remember that she was 9 months pregnant with triplets then..."

Where Are They Now?

"I hear you're something big in the city?"

"International Women's Day... When do men get their day?"

"Martha, are you sure you're not marrying me for money?"

'Eric the white horse' was fed up being associated with whiskey...so he decided to try beer instead!

"He's a genius at product placement."

"I'm crossing the road to keep my social distance."

QANON PROUD BOY

Death to Stultophobia

"They don’t seem to mind us — it's the humans they want to keep away."

'Hi - I'm from the Government, and I'm here to implant this little chip in your brain.'

"Does my bum look big in this?"

'After nine commercials I've forgotten what film we were watching.'

Do not allow your owner to foul the footpath.

"The idea is to start a little satellite program of our own...."

'The following program was made possible by a secret cabal of greedy capitalists....'

Civilization Ltd Urgently Asks To Stigmatize the Unvaccinated!

'A nice feature of this office, the view from that window won't distract you from your work.'

"The scratchpost is for the cat, the other one is for my son."

"Want to look better in your swimsuit? Visit Sally's Fitness Spa..."

"How do I know you won't turn around and blow it all on milk?"

A panhandler with a sign that reads "Sadder but no wiser".

'Upsize your children' - 20 to 25 % of children are obese.