Comical Cop Gifts

"We're all metric now..."

Cop Shop: Bulk, dried blood, shaved hair, ground teeth, assorted body parts and bone fragments.

"If we could explain it in Hip-hop, officer?. . . It would be like this!"

Projection

For the last time, officer, I'm absolutely, positively sure it was number four.

Stun-gun target practice.

'Pull it over, Speedy.'

Containment Cops

Piñata police line-up.

'...if you don't stop..er..singing Mr Bieber I'll arrest you for possessing an offensive weapon as well as drunk driving.'

'Donut shop is down the hall to your right - and I'm not answering any more questions without my lawyer present.'

Oh, sorry, I didn

"Victor one to control...we want to report a stolen car, Sergent - A white saloon with a little blue flashing light on top..."

'So how do you like the new job?' - 'Not bad, better than walking the streets.'

'Yeah it looks like we finally caught that peeping tom...'

'Number three. Definitely number three.'

'Good cop - bad cop is enough. We don't need morally ambiguous cop.'

"Come on out, Rocco. We know you're in there."

'I'm not a bad driver, they're bad pedestrians.'

'Okay, sit there. . . but give me the keys.'

"Avon calling..!"

"I decided to ticket you 'cause I'm bored again."

Don't Walk - "They Buddy, can't you read!"

"Why do you keep saying I have the right to remain silent."

Good Cop, Bad Cop, Lousy Cop

'OK - Spread em.'

"Feelings? You were screaming because he was hurting your feelings?"

"I guess a driverless patrol car is okay, but can you back me up if we get into trouble?"

"I am trying to pull over!"

'Does your dog bite?' 'Oh, please, please, please, boss, let me handle this one!'

'Anything you say will be taken down and may be used as evidence of my overtime.'

Man walking past a policeman. He noticed pig hooves coming out the bottom of the policeman's pants.

"May I speak freely?"

Policewoman

'I'm sorry sir, but I'm arresting you for impersonating an undercover police officer.'