Comic Strip Reading Pillows

'Of course I went AWOL, sir — you told me yourself that a soldier's first duty is to escape.'

'Well, I hope you're satisfied -- I had Lady Godiva arrested, and Parliament impeached me!'

Grace For Flies

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

'Fetch.'

Doctor describes inside guts while patient has black thoughts.

Billy. The Kid.

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

The Amazing Man-Spider

'Look around, son. See if there's one you like. But remember: These are abandoned players, unwanted by their teams - so they might come with some psychological baggage.'

'Me, I don't spend my pocket money: I hoard it...'

'No ice.'

Pirate Squirrels Looking for Buried Treasure

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

"The tests confirms you have short-term memory loss."

"Dear Wendy, please excuse the tardiness of my response to your recent tweet from Hoboken."

"The Hound of the Baskervilles, Watson--I took him walkies!"

"Been following me around all morning. I think it's the new intern."

'Actually, we were hoping you guys would have the solution to all our problems.'

Fish hunting for men.

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

'Satchel, I have just had a revelation.'

'Mom, don't you understand? Those collars are symbols of subservience and repression!'

The Salmon Run

"Yeah, I'm moonlighting. It's a living."