Comic Strip Pillows

'Will you be going by air, rail or handbasket.'

"Next walk, we’re going to the park."

Fishing Term: Terminal Tackle

'Kids get right up my nose!'

Grace For Flies

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

Doctor describes inside guts while patient has black thoughts.

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

"You're turn to grill tonight Adam, you make the best ribs."

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

"So, you say I'll be doubling the numbers of animals I kill?"

'Look around, son. See if there's one you like. But remember: These are abandoned players, unwanted by their teams - so they might come with some psychological baggage.'

"Please ask your pet to kindly put down the weapon."

"Would you relax? All you guys are so tense. I just wanted to tell you to your face how enigmatic I find you."

'No ice.'

Pirate Squirrels Looking for Buried Treasure

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

"If you'd only come to me sooner I wouldn't have had to go to lunch."

"The tests confirms you have short-term memory loss."

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

Please Drove Carefully.

'Alright, which one of you wise guys pulled the fire alarm?'

Support group for sheep.

"But if you cure my hypochondria I won't have any hobbies."

"Been following me around all morning. I think it's the new intern."

'Actually, we were hoping you guys would have the solution to all our problems.'

Fish hunting for men.

Chaos Theory - a butterfly flaps its wings...