Comic Strips Pillows

'I'll have the vegetarian option please.'

'Your call is very important to us, so please continue to hold.'

The delicate balance of supply and demand

'The specialist gave me this medicine for my hearing loss. He said two drops a day in my beer, but so far I haven't noticed any improvements.'

"Of course I don't have your shoes...you told me you wanted them re-sold."

Believe me VHT=003. You are too low!!

Overeaters anonymous meeting today at 5:00.

'Guess where these low cost shotgun shells were made!!'

Guy sitting on bank pulling up fishing line with sign from fish attached to hook reading' Got anything better than worms?'

Santa Confronts the Industrial Age.

'If you're stumped, I've got lots more great symptoms.'

'I can't pretend I'm not a little disappointed.'

'I think it's time you enter a 1,200-step program.'

'Sure, pin the blame on the donkey.'

'Fred suddenly regretted having drunk so much coffee...'

'Still haven't given up on your lawn, eh, Pertzborn?'

'I'd also like to welcome Henderson here, who joins us through Equal Opportunities for the undead.'

'Okay, time to sleep now. Switch off your nose, Rudolph'!

"I'm at the point where I find mixed signals reassuring."

"From way up here, that looks just like Uncle Ken, and that looks like Ed over there..."

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

If this plutonium should start to roam,box it's ears and sent it home.

'How many peanut butter sandwiches to paint my house?'

'you try playing Bingo every day on what Social Security pays!

'How come I never see you in church?'

'Read the suspect's statement back to me.' 'Aayagh! Stop it! Aayagh! All right! I confess.'

'At death's door'

'I don't get it. You don't sit, you don't beg, you don't give your paw and yet they still feed you!'

"I have no idea where we parked the car, or why we exist."

NON-COMPLIANT

'I'm thinking about cutting off my ear, just like my idol, Vincent Van Gogh.'

'It's in my belly-button if you must know!'

The Friendly Loan Company

'Let's face it, we're nothing but a puppet government.'

'One that doesn't meow too much.'