Comic Relief Chaser Pillows

"I'm innocent. I've just never been able to pass up a good plea bargain."

I think I just oiled myself...

"He's very persuasive ... "

Escaping the Office

"Another asteroid free day."

Fountain of youth. Fountain of intelligence

"Hey, flea-bag. Lift a leg... lose a limb."

Critisize your weight.

'That dog won't hunt.' Bird dog in a pink tutu.

"There may be a quick layover to check on her young."

"You mean that blond we saw 3 dunes ago wasn't a mirage?"

Working from home

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

Squirrel Chasing a Dog

Overjumpers

"I got super baked in the shire and accidentally recruited these four little weirdos for the most important mission of all time."

Society for the preservation of dragons - "You don't want them to become extinct do you."

'Every night it's the same - always my turn to put the Bally Cat out!'

"The bottle says that 'Extreme Hair Growth' is a rare side effect of this medication."

'Pssst! Straighten up, here come the bigwigs.'

"Don’t worry, this guy is totally cool. Just don’t mention the Red Baron."

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

'It's good to be here. We're having economic problems where we come from.'

'You're not supposed to catch them!'

'Ugh Look The whole garden is just one giant cat toilet'

Super Heroes.

"I have to refill it everyday. He has a tendency to retain water."

My God, I need to fart.

In a cycle - one bucket out, one bucket in.

"Eat me"

No littering...

"Wait—what did I come into this room to do?"

The Alpha Seltzer