Comic Dental Patient Gifts

Open Wide The Dentist's View.

"Right now, grandmom's bark is definitely worse than her bite!"

Improvised Dentistry.

"I don't think the crackling sound coming from your lower back is as serious as you thought. Just relax and I'll have this Rice Krispie Square out of your back pocket in no time."

Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep and with the sun if I've found death, please excuse my morning breath.

"FYI that the novocaine will numb the pain caused by the drill but won’t help with the pain caused by the overhead adult contemporary music."

I see braces in his future.

'I'm worried: He doesn't have buckteeth...'

"Remove your shoes and socks. We ran out of laughing gas"

"It's teeth whitening."

Dr. Morton believed he had found a less upsetting way to give his patients Novocain shots.

'Maybe you should stay away from dental humour.'

'Did the nasty man hurt you?'

"And then I said 'Don't worry, this is perfectly safe!' Ha, ha!"

'Open wide.' 'Your wallet.'

"Needs ketchup."

'Two cavities, that's not so bad. But I only have three teeth'

"Of course, I would suggest a shot of novacaine."

"That's a nasty cavity. That is why it is so important to brush your hair."

"You're not a gift horse, are you?"

'I need you to open wide, Peel.' - 'Ahhh.' - 'Not your mouth, fool! Your wallet.' - 'Arghhh!' - 'Wider!' - 'Argh!'

'I had no idea floss could be used like that!'

'What filling do you want?' 'Chocolate.'

'So that's why babies don't have teeth.'

"Be careful what you say, Senator. Putting your foot in your mouth greatly increases the risk of athlete's gum."

Emergency room: 'He has a dislocated jaw, because his dentist kept telling him to, 'open wider'!'

'Yes I floss regularly. Once every 6 months when I come here!'

"Lunch break."

"You want a local anesthetic? Okay, our receptionist will tell you endless stories about her grandchildren."

"Be right back... my activity tracker says it's time for me to take a short walk."

'As a matter of fact, I do prefer red wine to white. How did you ever guess?'

'My, what large dentures you have, Grandma.'

'Get them whitened? It took me $50,000 and five thousand bottles to get them this way.'

'Yes, I'm afraid he's going to need braces...'

After installing a set of braces, Dr, Ortford went through a thorough quality-control procedure,