Comedy Cruiser Gifts

Noah's Ark on a cruise ship.

Mountain bikes and molehill bikes.

'That strange smell, George.. is FRESH AIR!'

"Nobody listens to me complain quite like you do."

Tom Cruise

"How long have you felt like a three-masted schooner?"

"Balance is essential, Ray. For example, this week, my life is purpost-driven, and I'll follow that with seven days of aimless drifting!"

Spinner luggage is fast becoming the city walker's, walking companion of choice. There's no stopping, no mess, nor butt sniffing, with the added bonus that it comes with you when you go on holidays. . ."

"I'm looking for a car with backseat performance."

'I've never eaten here. I come for the broadband.'

'I realize you love my boat, but you've been on it for nearly a month now. Do me a favor and go home.'

Playboy has rigged his car with a loveseat

'My wife insisted I stop and ask someone for directions. Could you just pretend you're giving them to me?'

'Can we do a quick respray to match her super new outfit?'

Heart of America or Bypass

"It used to just be flowers but now I also do subpoenas."

'Top dog or not, you gotta slow down.'

'University tenure, now there's a sweet gig.'

"Baldo, I don't need advice on looking cool in a new car."

"This one should be a pushover. Agent Walt did the ground work years ago."

'I'll bet you fifty dollars that you can't stop gambling' Colour

'The carnival has a company car.'

Riding with your jacket open in summer is an ideal way to collect wasps,

"After you build your lowrider, we're gonna look cool cruising the boulevard! When did you get your driver's license?"

"You can tell me. They're all knock-offs...RIGHT?"

"Yeah, I'm sure you feel pretty cool on a car ride with your master, but me, I ride with my master on his Harley. . ."

"Sorry... But I'm afraid this is a couples only cruise!"

"They didn't tell us this blues cruise actually gives you the blues."

'It was nothing personal, Joe. I merely asked whether a card was missing.'

'Keno?...Keno?'

'Why open a savings account? Look at all that change in the ashtray.'

You do know the skateboard was invented by the devil.

Luck Accounted For

A fruit machine player is surprised to win real fruit.

"I told you to part your hair in the middle."