Comedy Cat Gifts

"Let's see now: All dogs have four legs. I have four legs. Therefore, I am a dog."

"If you ask me, wearing these things only makes them nervous."

'Tiddles has left everything to an old folks' home.'

Cat Reunion

"I only scratch up the furniture hoping they'll replace it with something more stylish."

"I now what you've come to expect from me is physical comedy, but tonight I thought we'd try something a little different."

"Projectile hairballing."

"What we're looking for is someone who think outside the box?"

'Waiter, there's a hairball in my soup, too.'

Cat holds sign which says - Will purr for food.

Cat Zoom Meeting

"But some of my best ideas come while I'm in the litter box."

'What? I'm scratching the sofa! I'm not! And if I was? It's your fault!'

Hell No Kitty

"I hate it..."

'Oh, this will be good! He just putted into a sand trap...our litter box.'

Litter Box Logistics Ltd.

'Yeah, I'm a mouser.'

Litter Tray Stonehenge

'Oh no! That's not litter! It's quicksand!!'

'I'd like the tongue, please.'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: The Pied Piper

"What SPF sunscreen do you suggest for lying around in a sunny spot?"

'I hate surprises!'

Cat Lover's Leap.

"Ever wonder where all those cat videos come from?"

'I don't mind you singing, but I draw the line at your banjo playing.'

Owner Rolls Out Red Carpet For Large Cat

'Who did you have lick your hair?'

Santa Claws...

The Curiosity Mars rover is seen killing a cat: 'Mission accomplished.'

Man asks haughty looking cat: "And how, exactly, do you qualify as a spokesman for the feline community?"

"He says he can quit anytime, but I'm starting to worry."

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Balloon

'According to the latest data, our social media post rankings are staying fairly consistent with consumers, hovering just below cat shaming memes.'