Comedy Angel Gifts

'I knew I should've used the fluorescent golf balls.'

"You're kidding! You count S.A.T.s?"

"Your mom needs to know that you made it here OK, and your dad wants to know if you could use a few bucks."

Mr. and Mrs. Angel

I know time is an earthly construct, but I still feel sleepy in the afternoons.

An amplified harp

"I still maintain an online presence."

"What kind of bra are you looking for?"

"Hey! You were that old sourpuss who worked at the motor vehicles department!"

"So much for eternal rest."

"Say what you like about Hell, at least they have solid floors."

Late Night TV

"But don't bother making up a schedule for all those projects. I've got all the time in the world now."

'Let's see...yes, there is a wing upgrade for a soul patch.'

"The only problem with Heaven is there's nowhere to hang stuff."

'I‘ll be relieved when they invent the aeroplane, these long trips are playing havoc with my wings'.

"I chair the safety committee here, but since we're all dead, it's largely symbolic."

Fat angel eating halo like doughnut

Heavenly Take Out

"You received your rewards on earth."

"Happens every time someone runs an electric can opener down there."

'But how did you lose your harp?'

"Why corona? I thought they were getting a bit too cocky."

"Nope, wrong password. You've got two more tries..."

"I guess they really are permanent."

"Oh, come on, you must want to be remembered for something!"

'Gee, I never expected to find this problem here too!'

'I can't believe I locked my keys inside, again!'

"Then my wife said it wouldn't kill me to go to the ballet with her."

"I get great reception this way."

Angel Puppet.

"Hon, what's an allegory?"

"You're lucky that your parents donated a building to Heaven."

"Harps only? Down, please."

"Looks like you have Heaven Basic."