Comedy Amateur Gifts

Randall couldn't wait to see what else the 'Magic Trash Can' could make disappear.

The Department of Really Stupid Ideas: 'Most people think they just appear out of thin air! But the truth is, there's a great deal of very hard work involved!'

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

"His first out-of-body experience."

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

"Again? This is the last time I'm letting you wear the pants with the little zipper."

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

"I've done this procedure so often I could do it in my sleep. But that's only happened twice – that I'll admit to."

"The fish sticks here are very good."

Dog Walking Services

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

Squirrel Chasing a Dog

Skiing.

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

Intelligent people laugh too!

'He has your nose and my ears.'

"I've no idea. Maybe it's the slumber channel."

"It was better before God took up knitting."

Shakespeare does stand-up comedy in the round.

"I'm afraid you could go at any time."

Clown throws a bucket of confetti over car at 'Jimbo's carwash'.

"This next one is called 'The Sermon on the Mount.'"

"I told you playing Pin the Tail on the Donkey was a dumb idea."

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

M.T. accidentally triggers the predator pursuit response.

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

"Who's taking my order—the committee of the whole, or is there a liaison for decaf?"

Saint George and the Drag Queen

Moses' Tablet

'He's the one who needs obedience training!'

Frank was certain his Bird of Paradise mating dance would press all the right buttons with Margaret.

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."