Comedically Tough Eaters Gifts

Workmen eat steel beams at lunch hour.

'Oh, and I suppose I'm the only one who's ever heard it's a 'dog eat dog world'?'

"Well, I'm the company sports champion! During the lunch break I ate more hamburgers than any other colleague!"

'Where do you want to go for breakfast, fancy an Australian or do you want to nip over to Hawaii?'

'Do you want toast with that?'

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

The BLTR (the bacon, lettuce, tomato, revolution)

'Ooh girl, he may look like a potato, but he moves like a yam!'

"Michael, do your dinner."

"How am I supposed to trust my gut when it can't even handle a little dairy?"

Cathy decides to remain standing on the scale until she loses weight.

Prune Eating Contest: Last Man Standing.

I won! I finished my pizza first! Want to make it two out of three?

What can I get you? Coffee? Tea? Sandwich? The mackerel mocha sounds lovely. What's in it? The usual. Chocolate. Soy milk. Mackerel. Yes, but is the mackerel farm-raised or from the sea? Ocean. Atlantic? Pacific? Indian? Arctic? Antarctic? I'm not sure. Oh. Ok ... well what's the mackerel's mercury content? Negligible, I'm sure. Ok. Was it exposed to any chlorine? Or copper sulphate? Or malathion? Was it treated with kindness? Was it read stories and sung to before bedtime? Yes. Never mind, it s

'There is something wrong with the spinach. It tastes good.'

All you can eat buffet...speed limit: 750 calories per minute

Dessert Storm Veteran

'I must warn you, I'm an army boxer.'

'Hello, police? There's been a food fight here and I'm afraid the cheese got the worse of it.'

"He's allergic to peanuts, sensitive to wheat, lactose-intolerant, and just plain weirded out by fruit."

'Well I can assure you sir, the fish was fresh when the menu was printed last tuesday.'

Bear in hotdog eating contest.

State Fair. Fun. You won a ribbon in the eating contest? What for? Honorable munchin'!

'Joe's Junk Food.' 'At least he's honest.'

"Are you the gent who complained about cold soup?"

'All you can eat, burgers.'

'The dietary exchange for this food is 3 days of unrelenting remorse.'

Salsa on a Stick.

FOOD FIGHT AT THE OK CORRAL.

"Now Harold, you know those always give you heartburn."

When your trainer said stretching is a key component of your new fitness program, she wasn't talking about your stomach!

"I have no trouble losing weight...it's just that I'm better at finding it."

'A candy bar and cheese crackers? You call that a balanced lunch?'

"It started out as a bun fight then someone started throwing rock cakes."

Brian was glad he had decided to have a light breakfast before embarking on the pizza eating competition!