Comedic Food Connoisseur Gifts

'Unexpected item in bagging area.'

'Just sausage, ham and burger. . . No pepperoni with they way my upset stomach is. . . Oh, and order the heart-shaped pan pizza so I can keep the heart-shaped pan for makin' pan brownies.'

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

'He's trying to put some magic into my recipes.'

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

"I come here for the pepper."

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

'Pigs feet, sir?' 'Are they pickled?'

Full English Breakfast.

A burgandy from when the dow hit a record high.

'Choose, Fenster

Enjoying a picnic at the rugby ground

"Regular service or affected?"

'Six different chefs in six months and they still can't make a decent broth!'

'Just look at him. The face that lunched on a thousand chips.'

Sale on Bathing Suits, One Size Fits None.

this bordeaux speaks for itself

'Do I really have to remind you again about which one of us earns the truffles, Jean-Claude?'

Steam from dinner in restaurant forms dollar sign

'Bye dear! I'll have another nice reindeer steak ready for you when you get back.'

'Wine represents all things civilized. It's an artistic expression, a manifestation of cultural enlightenment...'

'Do you call this spaghetti'

'Well, somebody on this stupid little planet ordered an extra-large with pepperoni and mushrooms!'

'It's Blurred.'

Ordering Food At A French Restaurant.

"Mrs. Simpson would like the recipe for your 'delicious steak pie', dear. Do you think you could dig the packet out of the recycling tub?"

'Do you want toast with that?'

"We're gonna need a bigger comic."

'This 'homework,' was it done today?'