Comedic Family Moments Pillows

"But if I close the drawer, won't my breathable underwear suffocate?"

"Get another cab, Dad. This one is creepin' me out."

"Dad, tell me about the birds and the bees and safeguards."

'Who says women don't like chase scenes?'

Kid to pastor: 'Which office is heaven?'

'Baby's first two-step.'

"Have you met my bodyguard?"

'Your mother makes a wonderful spoiler.'

"Two boys from legal to see you."

Billy strip: comic will make you sick.

'...you'd better get yourself a good lawyer!'

"Being a parent is like being in prison. . . except we don't get the hour of exercise."

Sonographer and pregnant couple looking at images of the fetus on a screen with options to share the image on various social media platforms

'Are you sure you didn't swallow your cell phone? I keep getting a dial tone.'

Wind shear - 81 st and Lex

"Mom said I can't watch TV until you finish my homework."

Meerkats - A Family Portrait

Chip and Fran Cooper: The Most Embarrassing Parents in the World.

"Next time your virtual fish dies, please don't try flushing your computer down the toilet."

"Pianissimo! Pianissimo!"

"How did my mom know I went to get ice cream after school? She's either placed a tracking device on me, or she's tracking my phone."

'Don't you just love them when they're at that age?'

'I've done the washing up - Do we have any glue?'

Even before we began to order in, my dad was always keen to skip the dishes!

"Sorry mate, I can't sneak out at night: My mum would definitely catch me..."

"Why is there a picture of an old man in the bathroom?"

'Let's hit the road, son! We are Baby Bjorn to be wild!'

"Look. He's just created his first text output object."

"I dunno. It just doesn't "feel" like a diaper."

"Is this your first time with an undercover cop?"

'Since we were first married, I vowed I'd never let Jim see me slopping around in the mornings with my hair in curlers!'

'I'll bet my Dad's pants are bigger than yours.'

Thanks to Floss-A-Cuffs, parents can be certain that their kids will maintain proper oral hygiene.

"My dad and I are trading important life skills. He's teaching me how to change the oil in the car."

'The air is thinner up here, isn't it Dad?'