Comeback Kings Pillows

'The best gig I can get you for your comeback, Lazarus, is DJ in the graveyard slot.'

Smart Ass - Wise Ass

"The peasants are revolting Sire."

'You've made a powerful enemy'

"This number goes out to all the little people I met on my way back down."

"And in the category of 'The Most Amazing Comeback from an Academic Nosedive,' the winner is..."

"He's writing a novel for the first time in decades. It has less to do with the urge to create or say something new, and more to do with the fact that all his previous books are now out of print."

"I'm so happy to be back in the workforce I'll never complain out loud again about Mondays."

A lesson in wit

'Why are you so obnoxious?' 'Heredity!'

"I know I told you to fool him into thinking you've got nothing left, but now you've got me convinced."

I guess Grandpa was once a wise king, too. He always says he does his best thinking on the throne.

"Try a new tactic, punch back."

"Stimulating this area of the brain will enable the patient to think of all the clever things he wished he had said."

"Where are all the hecklers? I have some great rejoinders."

The Fountain of Youth.

"Quick, Bartlett! Instill them with hope!"

"This accident will not affect my career as a football pro. Fortunately, I'm left-footed."

'Reinventing myself.'

'I would go to the end of the world for you.' - 'Yes, but would you stay there?'

"I think I've already had my fifteen minutes of fortune."

'I'm proud of the lads. They show'd a lot of character coming back from one down. . . then two or three silly goals. . . At this level you get punished. But overall I thought we were a bit unlucky. . .'

'After I get my MBA I'll live in New York and summer in Europe before moving back in with my parents.'

'... but you've gotta admire him for at least trying to come back after an injury of that magnitude.'

"Phil is my Vice President in Charge of Snappy Comebacks."

"I've got an idea for my comeback."

'Mr. Churchill, you are drunk !' 'Yes Madam and you are ugly but tomorrow I shall be sober.'

King James I